Thankful Thursday: For the Love of a Moody Two Year Old!

Kora has been crying lately, for reasons I don't even claim to understand.  It's a relatively new phase, or maybe we've been through this before, and I've forgotten.  Sunday evening, she was crying about everything (pretty sure she was just tired), but even after she woke up from a long nap during church, she just seemed inconsolable. She'd just burst out in tears at the slightest thing.  That's just not like her, she cries, of course, but usually I know why, and she's easily consoled and a happy camper in no time.

So what do you do, with a crying child, that you desperately want to understand, and your mommy-magic to make it all better just doesn't seem to be working?  Sunday evening I just did my best to distract her and talk to her about things I knew she liked or would want to do.  And I tried to understand the little things (secondary I'm sure).  For instance, she wanted Kees to put her water cup in the floor of the van, but as soon as he did, she cried.  So I just asked her, "How can we help? Where should we put the cup? Do you want mommy to put it in her purse?"  Thankfully that worked. She was happy with the cup in my purse. Then, when we got home, I carried her up the stairs, and I whispered in her ear, that I love her and I want to help her feel all better.  Can't remember what else I said, but just basic comforting things.  When we made it up to the house, she was better and enjoyed sorting candy with Kees.

Here's the thing, sometimes, with little people, they have a lot of emotions they don't know how to name, and they aren't sure what they need or how to be comforted.  It's a hard position to be in, as a parent, and all you can do is try.  You may find something that works, and you may not.  I'm trusting that as my kids get older, they won't remember exactly what I did, but how I did it.  And hopefully, I'm responding in love and compassion, at least most of the time.

This morning, Kora woke up, cranky, and aggressive.  I gave her a time out for hitting Kees, and then I told her to go find a book and we could read together.  In all honesty the lashing out, coupled with a few crying bouts from her, and I was feeling emotional myself.  I had to take a deep breath and give myself a mommy pep talk.  She found a book, brought it to me, and I read it twice, then we took twenty minutes talking about each and every page of the book.  I asked her to find certain things on the pages, and explained anything that was new, like the picture of a lighthouse, and the various kinds of buses.

I was so surprised when she said, "You find purple car, behind this one." And she pointed to the green truck in front of the purple car.  She's 2!  That's great vocabulary and even a directional word thrown in there.

This morning, I feel like I had a small victory.  I chose to spend quality time with my child, even though I felt like locking myself in the bathroom and crying.  The result was so much better this way.  And now, as I am typing this, she is playing with Kees. They've been working together in the kitchen for 20 minutes, and my happy Kora girl is back!  Thank you LORD.  (I also prayed with her before we read our book, so this was an answer to my prayer)